I’M NOT GOING TO WAIT AROUND FOR YOU TO BE READY FOR A RELATIONSHIP

I’ve already wasted too much time and too many feelings and wishes to allow this to continue any longer.

It was so easy to fall into this emotional limbo with you and now I am forever stuck somewhere between a friend and a lover and that’s not where I want to be.

I don’t want things to be either or—I want everything.

I want to hear the words “girlfriend”, “us” and “In the future, we will…” come out of your mouth.

I don’t want this mess of on-again-off-again. This hot and cold, we are together then we are not together, is driving me crazy.

I don’t want to make excuses for why you haven’t texted or called. I don’t want to be here only when it’s convenient.

I don’t want to be your stop along the way, I want to be your destination.

I won’t force you to do anything, I know that love can’t be forced but I won’t stay if you are not one hundred percent committed to me. 

I don’t want to play games, I think I am a bit too old for that.

If you can’t communicate your feelings and tell me what it is that you want from me, you are not the man for me.

I don’t want to guess your feelings from the way you say or text things. I don’t want to read between the lines.

I want openness and clarity for a change.

Yes, I want commitment but that doesn’t mean I want you to marry me. 

That means I want you to give us a chance to actually have a relationship. It means I want to try and see where this takes us.

It means I want you to tell me that we are exclusive and that you have eyes only for me.

I don’t see a reason here for your unreadiness. I don’t see that there is something to fear or run away from.

I am tired of thinking of all the things that we could be but we’re not.

I am tired of wishing for things to be something they are not.

That’s why it’s time for you to decide whether you want us to be together or not. 

I won’t settle for bits and pieces of your love, I want all of it.

I don’t want to beg for your time, I want you to show me that you want to spend time with me.

I want you to match my efforts and investments, nothing more and nothing less.

I am not going to wait around for you to be ready, I can’t do that anymore.

If we can’t be in a real relationship, we won’t be in an almost one either. 

I am done with selling myself short.

I am done with thinking that maybe I am not enough because I am more than enough and I am, like every other human being, worthy of love.

I deserve more. I deserve to have it all. I know that now.

That’s why I am asking you to choose. That’s why I am ready to say goodbye to everything that’s holding me close to you.

In the end, I want you to know I have no regrets when it comes to me and you. I am happy that it happened.

I am grateful for all the beautiful memories and happy moments.

I just can’t live for those moments anymore. I need the whole package. I need a real relationship; anything else is just not enough. 

If you decide to let me go, that’s OK too.

It will hurt like hell, it will rip my heart into pieces but I’ll be all right because what we have now is also causing me more pain than bliss.

I can’t force you to be ready but I can stand alone. I’ll be good on my own because if I am being honest with myself, I never really had you.

I had the idea of us, I had the vision of what we could be, I had parts of your heart but it was never entirely mine.

That’s all I want from you, your entire heart, and if I can’t have that then I don’t need anything from you.

If I can’t have that, I wish you all the luck in life but your life won’t include me, not anymore.

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